tumbling
fear, reactions, saying the wrong thing….these seem to be the order of the day. we have been almost constantly running around. any unplanned moment gets filled very quickly. what are we running from? in un-running moments, we feel overwhelmed and unable to get anything accomplished. we have even been unable to reach out to good friends like the myriad and tracey. there is diane and deb and sometimes cassidy, but with those guys everything is kind of surface, at least at this point in time. why is it that we are afraid to connect with people on a deeper level right now?
and we keep saying the wrong thing. myriad thinks we are angry and upset at them over the thing in group the other night. (we’re not) it was our own shit that made us react as we did…and we can’t seem to reach out to them to explain that we are not mad.
and why is it that we can’t seem to write in our journal if we are not in a really bad/weird/emotional/etc. place? is this another example of our running from something?
we have had times when we only wrote in our journal when we were in a hard place. i think it’s natural, for all kinds of reasons, and not necessarily a sign of running. but, ya know, that’s just us.
Comment by myriad — March 18, 2005 @ 5:22 pm