indigos journal

for the past few days we have been experiencing much anxiety. even our ativan, which is for our panic, has not stopped it.

also there has been much tooth pain. we have had to take pain killers because the pain was so bad. which, of course, means that we need to go to the dentist. we put that off as long as we possibly can…we are terrified of the dentist. and we can’t find a really good one because we have medicaid. so we end of waiting until things are at the emergency stage…which unfortunately makes the experience even worse. so maybe our recent panic has to do with this. or not. who knows?

cassidy got out of the hospital from the second surgery. unfortunately she is now back in there. some big complications. but the good news is that her cancer has been staged at 1A, which is the best result she could have gotten. it means no chemo or radiation are needed. so hopefully she can heal from this surgery and then get back on her feet.

i would sure love my friends lives to be calmer! we still struggle with lines, with boundaries…

we struggle…

haven’t been able to do laundry for the longest time. we have no clean clothes. haven’t been able to do the dishes. haven’t been able to cook. the list goes on…. i really wish we could get a worker like we had before. cause we really need some help getting things done. the more things sit undone, the worse we feel. i wish it was just a matter of will power…then we could do it all!

but at least there was that good news about cassidy.

and we do have some new good things to look forward to: on fridays we do gurps with myriad and aeron (after our therapy) and for a couple of hours on saturdays we do therapeutic activities like system mapping and timelines with a couple of friends.

so things are hard in some ways…but good in some ways too.